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House prices and Equity release?

G

Genome

Jan 1, 1970
0
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
 
H

Homer J Simpson

Jan 1, 1970
0
I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

When at the bottom of the market upsize.

When at the top of the market downsize.
 
M

Martin Riddle

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in
price so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar
shithole for the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA

Buy your neighbors house, that they cant afford. and rent it out to them. ;)

Cheers
 
R

Robert Baer

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
Yes; *NEVER* borrow money!
Most especially, !RUN! away from "easy" plans, "cheap" plans, etc ad
nauseum (almost as good as the Nigerian scams).
If you cannot pay for it now, do without it.
Exception: buying a house to *live* in for 5+ years; never refi
unless you can get a FIXED rate at least 2% lower than what you have at
present (roughly speaking, that 2% will pay the fees, etc).
A car?
Get a good used one that you can afford; if you can maneuver a better
price by signing a finance contract, look very carefully for pre-payment
penalties before signing.
Make sure that if you pay the balance in full within 30 days, that
the net cost is *less* than Cash.
 
R

Robert Baer

Jan 1, 1970
0
Martin said:
Buy your neighbors house, that they cant afford. and rent it out to them. ;)

Cheers
*THAT* is a superb idea.
To keep them as renters, give them a discount on the 12th month if
all payments during proceeding months are on time.
 
T

The Real Andy

Jan 1, 1970
0
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA

My wife wants to buy another house..... If only i could work out how
to claim beer as a tax deduction then I would be fine.
 
M

martin griffith

Jan 1, 1970
0
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
If the fox is smart, the fox will be patient and raise very fat
chickens. The fox works hard to gain the chickens' trust...so he cares
for them by providing slick brochures, branch offices and good-looking
salespeople who have been trained to sound like investors.


martin
 
F

Fred Bloggs

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA

It's not that your house is worth *more*, it is that your money is worth
*less*. You might straighten up your thinking.
 
T

TT_Man

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in
price so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar
shithole for the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
Have another drink mate.
 
M

martin griffith

Jan 1, 1970
0
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/business/story/0,,2042486,00.html



martin
 
J

john jardine

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
1] Keep up the mortgage payments.
2] Buy wisely and add value.
3] Dis the money lenders and their parlimentary running dogs.
4] Free up equity* by moving to mainland EC. They've more space and less
social stress.
5] Daily, thank the gods you've escaped enslavement.

(* Under no circumstances move oop North. It's hell up here)
 
P

Paul Hovnanian P.E.

Jan 1, 1970
0
You could sell your house and move in under a bridge. ;-)
 
R

Rich Grise, Plainclothes Hippie

Jan 1, 1970
0
You could sell your house and move in under a bridge. ;-)

Or find an abandoned RV and a friend who owns a factory who will
let you park it behind his dumpster, and live for free! ;-)

Cheers!
RIch
 
M

martin griffith

Jan 1, 1970
0
Or find an abandoned RV and a friend who owns a factory who will
let you park it behind his dumpster, and live for free! ;-)

Cheers!
RIch
BTDT, preferably close to a McDonalds, so you can use their toilets in
the morning. RV toilets don't have much capacity


martin
 
A

amdx

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in
price so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar
shithole for the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA
Just forget about it and do electronics!
 
R

Rich Grise, Plainclothes Hippie

Jan 1, 1970
0
BTDT, preferably close to a McDonalds, so you can use their toilets in
the morning. RV toilets don't have much capacity

I have a Del Taco and a Carl's Jr. about a block away - the Carl's has
the nicer head, but I won't buy anything there because the last time
I was there to buy food, there wasn't anybody in the joint who spoke
English. >:-[

I like Del Taco because they'll put a "Del Beef" (ground beef & cheese
burrito) on a bun - I call it a "Sloppy José". ;-)

And, ironically, their counter help speak English! :)

Cheers!
Rich
 
D

Dirk Bruere at NeoPax

Jan 1, 1970
0
Genome said:
I can now borrow lots of money on my house or I can sell it for lots more
money because, apparently, it is worth more.

Since my house is an even worse shithole than it was a couple of years ago
I'm wondering how that happened.....

I've sort of noticed that shitholes similar to mine have also risen in price
so if I sold mine to realise the profit I could buy a similar shithole for
the same price.

I have also noticed that if I did not have a shithole in the first place I
could borrow more money than I could before to buy one.

I think I am then allowed to remortgage it, put a plastic thing in the
garden, buy a new sofa and have an MDF kitchen.

Then I can get a loan to pay off all of my debts.

I'm sort of confused.

Has someone got some good advice?

DNA

Emigrate to somewhere where your shithole buys a luxury house.

--
Dirk

http://www.onetribe.me.uk - The UK's only occult talk show
Presented by Dirk Bruere and Marc Power on ResonanceFM 104.4
http://www.resonancefm.com
 
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