Imho using an accelerometer for this purpose is like taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut (although both are technically possible

).
May I suggest a different approach? Use a microphone to detect the sound pulse. Within the drum there should be a well discernible change in air pressure aka a sound when the drumstick hits the membrane. You can buy microphone modules with an integrated adjustable threshold detector which activates a digital output when the sound level passes the threshold. Imho exactly what you want. See this detailed explanation on
how to use a microphone module with an Arduino board (works the same with your ESP32) where lights are activated by sound. Comes with a circuit description and complete code.Sounds familiar to your original request?
A single LED as in the example may not be enough to light up the drum. Consider using multiple LEDs, but then you will need a driver as the little microcontrollers can't deliver enough power. Here's an
example of such a driver module.